Thursday, July 27, 2006
100% of FACT: Mother Theresa
Vatican officials have finally attributed a bona fide miracle to the late Mother Teresa of Calcutta, paving the way for the Nobel Prize-winning nun’s sainthood. It is understood that Teresa actually managed to cancel her AOL account at the first attempt, and never once received an “Increease You’re Penis Size” e-mail. A miracle indeed.
Known throughout the world for her kind and gentle nature, Nobel Peace Prize winner Mother Theresa of Calcutta was also an accomplished sportswoman who won a gold medal in wrestling while representing Albania in the 1968 Olympic Games. However, she provoked a huge moral outrage during the medal ceremony when she joined silver medalist Sister Wendy O’Merkin in the infamous “Nun Power” salute from the rostrum.
Known throughout the world for her kind and gentle nature, Nobel Peace Prize winner Mother Theresa of Calcutta was also an accomplished sportswoman who won a gold medal in wrestling while representing Albania in the 1968 Olympic Games. However, she provoked a huge moral outrage during the medal ceremony when she joined silver medalist Sister Wendy O’Merkin in the infamous “Nun Power” salute from the rostrum.
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
Research: Riddle of the Sphinx
Man has spent years trying to decypher the mysterious and ancient “Riddle of the Sphinx”. Working from our top secret laboratory in the back room of The Plough Inn, Tilehurst, we at the Lie Emporium have risked age-old curses and alcohol poisoning to reveal the riddle and its solution in its entirety :
Pharoah Rameses II : ‘I say, I say, I say ! My Sphinx has no nose’
High Priest of the Temple of Isis : ‘Your Sphinx has no nose ? How does it smell ?’
Pharoah Rameses II : ‘Terrible !’
High Priest of the Temple of Isis : ‘Kindly leave the pyramid’
Which just goes to show that the Riddle of the Sphinx is just about as ancient as you can get.
Pharoah Rameses II : ‘I say, I say, I say ! My Sphinx has no nose’
High Priest of the Temple of Isis : ‘Your Sphinx has no nose ? How does it smell ?’
Pharoah Rameses II : ‘Terrible !’
High Priest of the Temple of Isis : ‘Kindly leave the pyramid’
Which just goes to show that the Riddle of the Sphinx is just about as ancient as you can get.
